#2032

"FUCK THAT FUCKIN' SITE! IT'S A PIECE A' SHIT!"

—to Emma, about a Church of Cawd Facebook group


(Editor's note: I just think it's funny to call a website a "piece a' shit")

#2005

"The sale of Red Sox hats went up because of those Church a' Cawd idiots."

—to Cas3y

#578

"The people on the internet have been the problem the whole time. That's why they kept me in the class."

—to Cas3y, about sex offender treatment class

#508

"They're buryin' their own—they're burying their own gra—diggin' their own graves."

—to Cas3y, about the Church of Cawd

#449

"If it can't be fixed by the court of—by the court—the justice court ... then it's gonna be fixed by the court of public opinion. Because if I—ehhhnnh—if I don't get the ruling I want in court—that I'm expecting in court, I'm a' bring it to ABC, to FOX, and to CBS. And they'll put the information I have out on the media. And then let the public—the court of public opinion decide on it."

—to Tiffany, about the Church of Cawd and catfishes

#404

"I guarantee you most of them on—on the Church a' Cawd are probably fat. Cuz you look at how much time they spend in front of the computer, makin' up videos about me and doing all this retarded bullshit that they do—guarantee they got a bowl of ... sugar right in front of 'em."

—to Cas3y, about the Church of Cawd

#380

"They fucked me so hard, it's disgusting."

—to Cas3y, about the Church of Cawd

#351

“They will be confiscating phones. Eventually the authorities gonna wind up confiscating phones.”

—to Cas3y, about how the feds are going to help him take down the Church of Cawd