#2134

"Grab your fuckin' foreskin and stick it in your mouth." 

—to Winnie/Emma, who was pretending to be a very drunk Roy

#1815

"Don't be talkin' about your dick, Roy."

#1793

"Laurie moved out with her new boyfriend, which turned into be her husband. Then Ralph moved—ehlhhllgng—moved out with his girlfriend, which her name was Lori. And—ehhgng—so I—that's where I lost my two protectors. Thegghh—and then Roy was actually my LAST protector. And then he moved to California."

—to Ramona

#1740

"Leave them motherfuckers right there, FUCK 'em! They'll melt and they'll fuckinnn'—Roscoe and Sadie'll lick 'em up. FUCK 'EM! Besides mom, those motherfuckin' cubes—ice cubes are the only ahhhh-and Roscoe and Sadie are the only ones I can fuckin' rely on!"

—to Roy, who dropped some ice cubes on Lorne's floor

#1730

"Alright, enough talkin' about your pecker, Roy."

#1698

"I don't think about Roy's foreskin."

—to Winnie 

#1611

"He's ruining everybody's summer. Especially mom's. Mom's—Mom's sick. She's had a cold. She can't get rid of her fuckin' cold, because of Roy's bullshit."

—to Winnie

#1598

"You need to not concentrate on me. Me and Winnie have me. You need to have yourself."

—to Roy

#1438

"I seriously have never found a better fuckin' worker. Never seen a better fuckin' workuler—worker than him."

—to Winnie, about Roy (yes, he said "workuler")

#1332

"You seem to be awful intoxicated by him."

—to Winnie, about Roy

#1292

"Who's the 'golden child?' Well, before I fucked up, it was me."

—to Cas3y, when discussing his siblings

#1287

"He's never even shot a gun, except for when he was in the National Guard."

—to Cas3y, about Roy

#1185

"You better not talk about your fuckin' penis to my woman, I'll fuckin'—I'll beat your goddamn ass."

—to Roy

#1150

"He's busy talkin' to his African bitch ... nigger."

—to Winnie, about Roy's "girlfriend"

#955

"You're makin' bets of when my family's gonna die! That is fucked up!"

—to Cas3y

#716

"Roy's on his iPad talkin' to some girl that he THINKS is real."

—to Tiffany 

#431

"Either you have me for a boyfriend or you have Roy for a dad."

—to Winnie

#307

"If she wants to live in her truck instead of cleaning my shed out, that's her problem."

—to Jamie, about Roy's homeless girlfriend that refused to live in Lorne's shipping container