#2090

"You gotta realize, Mom, that Ralph and Laurie are not angels! They're pieces a' shit!"

—to Mama Gwen, about her two oldest children

#1939

"God forbid the two old—your two oldest kids never fuckin' do anything wrong! They're pieces a' shit! They're fuckin' worthless!"

 —to Mama Gwen, about Ralph and Laurie

#1855

"He was my oldest brother and the only father figure that I had."

—to Cas3y, about Ralph, who was 9 YEARS OLD when their father left (not to mention that Lorne had an actual stepfather for nearly 3 decades)

#1793

"Laurie moved out with her new boyfriend, which turned into be her husband. Then Ralph moved—ehlhhllgng—moved out with his girlfriend, which her name was Lori. And—ehhgng—so I—that's where I lost my two protectors. Thegghh—and then Roy was actually my LAST protector. And then he moved to California."

—to Ramona

#1294

"Ralph thinks about Ralph. Laurie thinks about Laurie. Paul thinks about Paul. It's all they care about."

—to Tiffany, once again blaming his siblings for his "ring of downfall"

#1292

"Who's the 'golden child?' Well, before I fucked up, it was me."

—to Cas3y, when discussing his siblings