"She's been being hayve herself."
—to Winnie, about Rhoda
#1812
"And drive careful. There's precious cargo in your vehicle. I'm talking about you being the precious cargo."
—text to Cas3y
#1807
"Iddin there some way that you can make ME feel special? Like, sleep with actual pajamas on?"
—to Jamie
#1806
"I want you to cum all over me. Not fart all over me—cum all over me."
—to Dan, who was pretending to be Casey
#1801
"Don't say we're not together, Jamie! You're just gonna hurt us every fuckin' time you say it!"
#1799
"Nothin's wrong with dick. But it's gotta be used in a smart way."
—to Rhoda, Lorne's 18-year-old "stepdaughter"
#1798
Jamie:
"I don't give a shit."
Lorne:
"That's obvious. But you sure give a shit about Carter's 'bro'."
—when Lorne was furious that Jamie called him bro, a word she "got from another guy"
#1797
"In order to have my wiener, you gotta have me, so, guess you'll have to learn to love me."
—to Winnie
#1796
"I go in my own head and I try to figure out where the hell I started doing it that—why I started doing it."
—to Tiffany (Debbie), about his constant lying
#1795
"How many guy's COCKS did she stop and suck on the way there to get pills?”
—to Jamie, about Maggie Jo
#1794
Winnie:
"What if you have to choose one, and there's only [Coke and Pepsi] in the ice chest, and you're really thirsty, and there's no beer, and your mom's twat is totally dry, and you're really thirsty?"
Lorne:
"Probably Pepsi."
#1793
"Laurie moved out with her new boyfriend, which turned into be her husband. Then Ralph moved—ehlhhllgng—moved out with his girlfriend, which her name was Lori. And—ehhgng—so I—that's where I lost my two protectors. Thegghh—and then Roy was actually my LAST protector. And then he moved to California."
—to Ramona
#1792
"It's like concrete, layin' between bricks. It's the mortar mix, it doesn't have any rocks in it. It's just a mortar mix. I'd say that when—when that mix is—is half-dry, that's—that's what I'd say your—your boobs feel like."
—to Jamie
 |
| Mixin' up a fresh batch a' boobs |
#1789
"Ih-ihhh-ih-it'll be officiated in person. But for now it's a temporary officiation."
—to Dan & Winnie, about Lorne and Winnie's telephone wedding
#1785
"I still think I'll end up being rich, because I don't give up. And I have too many talents to try to not make money from them."
—from Lorne's prison journal
#1783
"You wanna give me an ass attack? Well, come here and you can."
—to Winnie, who actually said she wanted to give him an "acid bath"
#1782
"When you have a boyfriend you don't let some other guy take you out to dinner and wipe your mouth off!"
—to Ramona, about the Doctor
#1778
"When your fiancé is calling you "bro," and it comes from another guy that she thinks is hot, and her friend is trying to hook them up when she's engaged—yeah, my penis is gonna fuckin' deflate."
—to Jamie, about her calling Lorne "bro" during phone sex
#1777
"But then you have no reason to not tell me about it, but you still—you still don't tell me about it. You have no reason to not tell me about it, but you still.... try to not tell me about it."
—to Ramona, about seeing the Doctor naked
#1774
Cas3y:
"So why would you have an issue with my ex [sleeping] on the couch?"
Lorne:
"Because he took your virginity."
#1772
"I thought it was a mutual agreement between us that we were together."
—to Tiffany (Debbie), about Paula, even though he also said that they never discussed being in a relationship
#1771
"You're supposed to be my girlfriend, why WOULDN'T you call me back?"
—to Ramona, after HE hung up on HER
#1768
"That was an evil-ass fuckin' laugh!"
—to Cas3y, about her writing "Hahahahaha" in a TEXT message
#1766
"Ehn-ehya—do ya—ennghg—do ya think I'm fuckin' stupid at what your goddamn bullshit is—is doin' right now?"
—to Jamie
#1765
"I got a—eh—a fuckin' MILLIMETER of her fuckin' time today and that COCKSUCKER was there all FUCKING day with her, Jamie!"
—to Human-Jamie, about Debbie and Angelo